Yesterday was a long day. We knew we would be receiving a phone call from Ben's doctor re: the lump on his neck, but we had no clue when that call would come. Ben went to work for the first time since his surgery last Thursday, and he felt pretty good. He called his doctor's office mid morning and was told the doctor would call him sometime after 6 pm.
So we waited.
And waited.
And we went to dinner with Ben's parents. And we all jumped a little when the phone rang. And sighed when it was someone checking in on Ben.
We had calls, and messages, and texts from our friends all day long checking on the prognosis. I know many of you were thinking of us and praying for us all day long, wondering when we would update you all. Thank you for loving us.
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It may seem odd to some of you why this lump was such a big deal. I don't know. Maybe lumps are always a big deal. I've never dealt with lumps, but I know I never like the sound of it.
Twenty-five years ago, my husband lost one of his big brothers to cancer (lymphoma). It presented with a lump in the neck. Just like Ben. Ben was only 8 when he lost his 17 year old brother. It still hurts. I'm not sure the hurt of losing a brother and son ever goes away. I never knew him. My kids never knew him. That also makes my heart hurt. My kids watch home videos of their uncle sometimes. They wish they had a chance to meet him. And someday they will in heaven. Someday.
My heart ached for the possible outcomes of his lump. But my heart ached even more for Ben's family, who knew first-hand the loss of a brother and son. As a mom, I cannot even imagine the pain of losing a child. My mother in law and my own mother both know this pain. But even more, I cannot imagine hearing that another of my children had a similar symptom, with a similarly suspected diagnosis. It's just too much and too unfair.
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We sat watching TV last night. At about 9:00, the phone rang. We both jumped and held hands. I sat quietly so I could hear the doctor talking to Ben.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, bengin. What?!?! Ben squeezed my hand and I knew I heard correctly. It was benign.
So why had the doctor had such a gut feeling that this particular lump was not good? Well, in this doctor's 43 years of practicing medicine, he had NEVER seen this particular type of cyst. He actually had to look it up to gain info on it to pass onto Ben. He had what was called a cervical thymic cyst. They account for only half of 1% of cysts. It is benign, not expected to come back, and Ben doesn't need any follow up visits.
Leave it to Ben to have the most rare type of cyst. That's totally him. Over achiever.
We are beyond relieved. I cried all sorts of ugly tears last night. I have puffy, swollen eyelids this morning. My husband is healthy. My children's father is healthy. My in law's son is healthy. Louie and Joel's brother is healthy. Tears all around. I felt like Oprah last night sending out texts....here's some tears for you! And some tears for you! Don't worry...you get some tears too!
Want to cry with me? Go ahead. I'm crying right now as I write this. I'm so thankful. So glad it's over. And so happy to move on in life. Thank you for praying with us, and checking in on us, and celebrating with us. Life is good. God is good.
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